3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
