they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
How external is "for external use only"?
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
