weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Randomize
