there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
