Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
