I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Randomize
