Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
