Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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