Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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