arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
