if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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