i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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