Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
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