am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
