i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
