Soap is not a condiment
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
