Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
How's work?
Spinning.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
