If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
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Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
