Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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