He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
