i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
