she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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