"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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