she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
