yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Randomize