You made me cry and you don't even care
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Say something about gay babies.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
