They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
