you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
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