why didn't you poke me back
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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