He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
