she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
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