the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
