let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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