If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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