she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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