Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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