didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
someone get that fucking seahorse.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
