So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
