I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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