She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
