summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
it glows. i had to have it.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
