Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
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