To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
we made out on top of his cat.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
