About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
