Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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