he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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