if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
