Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
