The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
