Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
