I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
